On Escalators

Something that's been bothering me for a very long time is the fact that many people just don't understand the concept of the Escalator Point of No Return.

The Escalator Point of No Return is a simple thing, and there really isn't any reason to ignore it or have confusion about its utility. Simply put: before you use an escalator, you approach it, and there is a boundary that separates the people who are committed to using it and those who have yet to do so. The Escalator Point of No Return is that boundary between the faithful and the wafflers. Escalators have a huge amount of machinery at the tops and bottoms, the motors that keep the steps moving smoothly and that heighten and lower the RPMs as the escalator gains and loses riders. You can always see these motors because there is a large metal grating at the top and bottom of an escalator. This metal grating is the Escalator Point of No Return. When you are standing on that grating, you have dedicated yourself to getting on the escalator. You have approached the escalator. You have reduced your distance to the escalator sufficiently enough to indicate intent to ride. The contrapositive argument is that if you do not intent to use the escalator, you would not be so close to it. You have your safety to think about, after all.

So if you're standing on that metal part, get on the goddamned escalator. Don't crowd your entire family around it and then pause to decide where you're going to eat lunch. If you want to have a conversation, do it someplace that is not impeding those who want to go up or down a floor. I have seen countless people walk confidently and purposefully up to an escalator, almost set foot upon the next step to emerge, then stop like a deer in headlights and wonder aloud "Wait! Where's Danny?" I don't know where Danny is, but I know he's not standing right behind you. I am, so move your ass.

Escalators are for everybody, so if you aren't using one to go somewhere, go away. I have an idea to differentiate the serious escalator riders from those who just want to stand around them and obstruct their traffic: metal detectors. Not the wands, but the big archway types. They don't even have to be turned on. A metal detector would give the correct signal to people who approach it. Namely, "passing through this metal detector indicates that you are entering a 'zone'". Erecting a metal detector in front of an escalator forces everyone to understand that passing through the detector indicates a commitment to its use. Think about it: who would dare to pass through a metal detector and not keep on moving?

Of course, I'm a stickler for decorum, so this idea probably sounds ridiculous to the rest of you.