Membership Has Its Benefits

Being a CWRU alum, I have certain perks. One: I get the privilege of sending them a check every month to barely chisel away my student loan. Two: I get a free subscription to the bullshit Case Magazine publication. The latest issue's only redeeming feature? The Doc Oc memorial article. Other than that, Case Magazine contains the usual bunch of self-congratulatory nonsense, the kind of touchy-feely masturbatory material you'd expect to find if your 4+ years at CWRU were spent enriching your life, chatting up your professors, and attending the thousands of on-campus international unity conferences they must have every week, as opposed to running headlong at nonstop homework and midterms until you've become a broken, bitter, and jaded shell of a human being.

Three: I still get access to a fraction of CWRU's networking features. I can get CWRU e-mail again. 30 new messages a day, all spam. And, even though I can't use nntp.cwru.edu, I can apparently still use news.cwru.edu. So, you know, it's not all bad.